July 9, 2005

Albertson's, Inc.

250 E. Parkcenter Blvd.

Boise, ID 83706

Dear Albertson’s,

It was three days ago. What I am referring to here is my trip to one of your Acme food stores. Let’s just say it was “the other day,” because Wednesday wishes to remain anonymous.

Anyway, here’s what happened. I amble right on in to your Acme store looking for the canned food products. An employee named Art helped me out. He showed me where those canned foods were. He really did! I picked up a can of General Stumpy’s Famous Sautéed Rutabaga Batter (the boysenberry flavored kind). General Stumpy was promoted from 2^nd Lieutenant after the Swedish-American war back in 1904. I got home, ready to dig in to my favorite food, when I noticed that there was a chunk of what was clearly Granny Flemmins Freeze-Dried Popcorn Cake sitting right in the General Stumpy’s. I was appalled to find this, because I HATE Granny Flemmins brand. It tastes like one of those Mr. Wilkins’ “Homemade” Caviar Ginger Snaps. And if you’ve ever eaten anything manufactured by the Mr. Wilkins company, you would know that it tastes like dirt. I really, really wanted to eat General Stumpy’s Famous Sautéed Rutabaga Batter that day, but I was unable to because of the manufacturing blunder. Since General Stumpy’s is a division of Albertson’s, Inc., I was wondering if you could send me a coupon for a free can. I always shop at Acme. It is the best grocery store out there!

Sincerely,

Kevin Dickinson

Home