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Sun
National Bank
226
Landis Avenue
Vineland, NJ 08360
June 18, 2007
Dear
Sun National Bank,
As
reluctant as I was at first to accept the fact that my chocolate chip
cookies were manufactured by a bunch of elves living in a tree, I have
come to accept it, nay – embrace it, as the truth. Needless to say, I
felt the same after seeing a sign in your window advertising a CD sale.
Usually I go to the bank to do, say, some banking. But you seem to be
hightailing it to the retail banking industry! “The FUTURE of
Banks!” they will say. People will pass your bank and they’ll say
it.
Unfortunately, I am not in the market for a CD right now. I was
wondering if you had anything in vinyl instead? In particular, I am
searching for an extremely rare record! There are only 14 copies of this
record in existence. “Because it’s so bad?” you might ask. NO! It is an
auditory masterpiece. An opus magnum of sound! The record in question
is: a rare Billy Joel EP in which all 38 of Shakespeare’s plays are set
to rock music (word for word!) in just under 11 minutes. I’ve heard you
have to slow it down just to understand it. Billy Joel is a true master.
Shakespeare was an OK guy I guess.
Do
you have vinyl, or is it just CDs you are selling? I’d prefer an answer
before I make the trip, as it is a grueling 5 minute drive (one way!).
Either way, the whole concept of selling CDs at a financial institution
is mind-blowing! I can take my money out of the bank, then buy a CD and
put it right back in. I love you, Sun Bank. I will never bank anywhere
else (unless I find my rare vinyl)!
Sincerely,

Kevin
Dickinson |