Millwork for Less

848 Old West Chocolate Ave.

Hershey, PA 17033

May 15, 2007

Dear Millwork for Less,

I was on your website, browsing your walnut doors. I was looking for a company that sold walnuts that I could eat, but I came across your site and couldn’t peel my eyes from the varnished masterpieces. Which got me thinking.

What I want to know is: do you make doors to the future? You know, where I could just open it up and see the future on the other side. I need to know, because the other day I was hit on the head with a brick, then I had a divine vision that all the world’s pants would go missing on December 2, 2015. What will we do without pants? It will be wintertime.

I am going to start sewing a secret supply of pants, which I will keep in my basement until December 2, 2015 when all pants disappear. But I don’t want to do stitch pants together for 7.5 years if this catastrophe never happens. With a door to the future, I can know for sure. A simple turn of a doorknob will confirm my divine vision.

No pants? Let’s prevent this. Let me know what you can do about my door to the future. And I will always shop Millwork for Less for all of my door needs.

Sincerely,

Kevin Dickinson

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