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Suggestion by my Mom |
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American Eagle Outfitters 150 Thorn Hill Drive Warrendale, PA 15086
May 16, 2007
Dear American Eagle Outfitters,
I was in the mall on Wednesday trying to find a fake moustache and a head of lettuce (for work) when I passed by your store. American… Eagle… Outfitters. I repeated the name several times to myself as I trekked the long corridors of the mall. Eagles don’t wear clothes, I thought as I passed by Orange Julius.
How come I have never seen an eagle wearing clothes? How do you stay open? Does Stephen Colbert give you generous amounts of money? What kinds of outfits do eagles wear? I have a sneaking suspicion it’s leisure suits, but you’ll have to confirm this for me.
Also, do you only outfit American eagles? Eagles do something called hibernating, which is flying south for the winter, so many of them are Canadian. So do you check IDs to make sure they’re American? Do eagles have IDs?
Please tell me what your store is about – this is boggling the folds of my brain!! Eagles are naked.
Sincerely,
Kevin Dickinson |
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