|
Elton John
Twenty-First Artists Ltd.
1 Blythe Road
London W14 0HG
UK
March 29, 2010
Dear Sir Elton John,
Even though you’re “down” with the Queen, this is not a letter asking you to get me knighted. I’m writing about your song “I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues” from your 1983 album Too Low for Zero. I’ve heard this song probably a hundred times, but I always expect it to turn out differently, kind of like how there’s a hot girl in horror movies who hitches a ride with a murderer, and you yell at her not to, but she does anyway and later on they identify her teeth. Every time you “guess that’s why they call it the blues,” I expect, as a trained philologist, to hear some sort of linguistic explanation as to why the color blue is associated with loneliness. Instead you croon about a hopeful reunion with a lover, ignoring your earlier etymological inquiry.
The Morris Dictionary of Word and Phrase Origins suggests it’s “an abbreviation of ‘blue devils’ — hallucinations, like pink elephants, popularly believed to accompany delirium tremens” (73). Your lyricist Bernie Taupin should have tackled this topic responsibly:
And I guess that’s why they call it the blues
It’s an abbreviation of ‘blue devils’
Hallucinations, like pink elephants
Popularly believed to accompany delirium tremens
This is from The Morris Dictionary of Word
and Phrase Origins (Collins Reference, 2nd ed., 1988)
Time on my hands could be time spent with you
Laughing like children, living like lovers
Rolling like thunder under the covers
And I guess that’s why they call it the blues
Maybe your voice isn’t what it used to be, but think of it as having accumulated flavor over the years. You’re still going strong, and this new recording certainly isn’t out of the question. Also if you could insert the word “asparagus” somewhere into “Madman Across the Water,” I would like you a lot better.
Before I end this letter, I was wondering if you could help me get knighted. I told you before I wouldn’t ask, but I hope that was long enough ago to put it behind us. I don’t like sleeping with the past. Is the Queen amenable to knighting strangers? I have the following qualities: heroic, brave, knightly, chivalrous, I did my taxes early this year, and I slowed down on Wednesday to let a family of chipmunks cross the road. The only thing I’m worried about is sweating in my suit of armor. How do you even play the piano in that?
Sincerely,
Kevin Dickinson |
